I haven't written in awhile, since I haven't been able to log onto my website. This past weekend was a crazy one. I was off from work Friday and Saturday. I studied Thursday all night for the NYPD test. Stayed up all day Friday, then went to pick up my check at work. I stayed and watched a movie. Chris Rock was there so I decided to hang out, then a friend from work told me to wait for her so we could go eat. I did. Then I waited for Andre to get out of work. We went eat at Blimpy's then caught a cab to New York Comedy Club. We went to a bar around the corner and had some drinks. Then we went back to the club, watched the show… It sucked. Drank more, then afterwards I started talking shit at the people in line wasiting for the next show. I had most of them laughing. The owner said to leave before he called the cops. We did. From there we went back to the bar, drank more, I told some girl something about her ass, she laughed, and some guy got mad and said to watch what I said to her. things get blurry from here… Andre said he was a cop, and he pulled his badge. We went somewhere else and somehow, at some point, Andre called his hooker friend. They met us somewhere(?) He left with her and the friend stayed with me, trying to encourage me that I needed to get laid. I was nice for a while, then she made a scene inside the store when I was buying cigarettes. I have no idea what I said but she left. Andre called me and told me that 'it' never happened. He had gotten into a talk with some Puerto Ricans and they took his money, my money. We went looking for them, nothing. After that we went to go eat at an Indian restraunt, then he said he was gonna go do something… So I went home. I don't know how I got there but I managed to pull it off like I had just gotten back from the store. I ate breakfast and went straight to my room. This is now Saturday morning. I slept for a couple of hours, then Crystal called and told me to meet her in front of Barns and Nobles at 2:30pm. I went back to sleep and woke up at 2:05. I called her left a message that I was running late and to wait for me. I got there at 3:15pm. I couldn't find her anywhere. I called her and got her voicemail, again. I caught a cab and she called me back at 3:20pm. I was already on 34th St. She said it was ok, that she didn't feel good anyway. I felt bad. I got to the school and waited in line… a long line. I finally got in and started the three hour test. I kept dazing off. I think I did okay, I hope I did okay. After the test I started walking, and kept walking. I didn't know where I was, I called Chuy and chatted with him as I walked. Then I finally got to a train station. The trains were running weird, like every weekend, and I had to take the downtown F, then transfer to the Uptown F. I finally made it home.. I don't know how, but I did. I slept all night and missed the Tyson-Lewis fight. I woke up Sunday at 11 am and went to work. I felt like shit. Eric asked who wanted to go home, I yelled that I would. I left and walked to Central Park, hung out there for a while, walked back and met Andre at 72nd. We went to Times Square and met his cousin. We ate and took a couple of pictures. We took her to Grand Central Station, and went back home. I don't know what's wrong with me, I have about $40 in my checking, and about $160 in my pocket. I'm going crazy. I really am, I need help. Today I went and looked around the internet for group counceling, and supprt groups, I'm really gonna look for something, I need help. Okay, well, thats it for today. Wish me luck.